Sunday, May 23, 2010

Birth Moms Deserve Our Respect

" . . . thanks to society's misgivings and misconceptions about adoption, birth mothers are damned if they do and damned if they don't. By indicating that placing a child for adoption is a selfish or painless choice when it's not, or talking about birth mothers as if they were all crack-addled prostitutes or at the very least wayward youth, we not only limit a woman's right to choose but also shut out the possibility that there are other people out there who would love to adopt. Why not try respecting these women as mothers able to make the best decision for themselves and their pregnancies—even if that decision is not to parent?
- from the last parargraph of Raina Kelley's Newsweek article, "Birth Moms Deserve Our Respect"

[There were also some references in the article to how birth mothers (both fictional and real) have been portrayed in the media recently- Juno, MTV's 16 and Pregnant and Brighton Palin, etc.  It would be interesting to go back and read the article in 20 years and see if anything has changed.] 

Incidentally, many times when people inquire about our little girl's birth mother they are surprised to find that she was not a teenager, but a single mother with two other children who chose to place her baby in a home with a father and a mother.

 And for that selfless decision I am eternally grateful to her.

1 comment:

Kylee said...

Yes, feel free to refer to my post!

Thanks for this post. I think it is easier for me to have respect for the parents who place their kids for adoption when they are born. It takes EVERYTHING in me to be respectful to the ones that have gotten involved in drugs and alcohol and have hurt and neglected their children and as a result their sweet, innocent kids end up being bounced from home to home in foster care. THAT is when I have a hard time. I try to give them the benefit of the doubt, but I need reminders like this on a daily basis, so thank you!