Saturday, January 8, 2011

A New Mommy and Daddy

George is getting a new mommy and daddy. Not the mommy and daddy who have been raising him since he was a baby. Not the strangers he was placed with 10 short weeks ago (us) whom he now refers to as mommy and daddy- and not his birthmother, but some relatives of his birthmother who have passed their background check and home study and are interested in fostering and most likely adopting him.

We learned this yesterday from his caseworker during a home visit. From the beginning of George’s placement she had mentioned that there was a distant cousin of his birthmother’s who might be interested in pursuing a kinship placement. Yesterday she informed us that after meeting with George’s birthmother (in jail) she wants him to be placed with her cousin rather than her friends who have been caring for him most of his life due to their criminal backgrounds and other reasons. However, the judge over the case is still adamant that George have visits twice a week with his previous caregivers even though he will not be returning to their care as kin always have legal precedence for placement and adoption of foster children.

The biggest question on my mind about this change of events was “WHEN will George be leaving? How much longer do we have with him?” Our caseworker informed us that she must officially give foster parents ten days notice before a child is moved to another home. (Which is nice considering we only have a few hours to a few days notice before child is placed with us.)

However, George’s caseworker wisely wants to set up some transitional visits with his soon-to-be caregivers, including overnight visits, for at least a couple of weeks before whisking him away to a totally new environment (AGAIN). Having to spend the night in a totally new environment is my biggest concern for George. Is it going to be a repeat of what he went through his first couple of weeks with us: Crying out for this mommy and daddy? Is he going to think that we’ve totally abandoned him?

I’m just crossing my fingers and praying that his new mommy and daddy are full of patience and love. And I’m glad that his relatives were able to come forward so early in the case, too.


Julie said...

Oh Mary... my heart is breaking for you. And for George. All the changes in his life are going to be so hard. I am glad he has you there to advocate for him.

jendoop said...

We've just been through a very similar transition. Although our little guy knew his new family before coming to us so it's not a totally new situation. He is doing well and we're going to his birthday party today. Hopefully George's new family is as open to you as our foster son's is to us.

So sorry that you have to say goodbye, but I'm glad it happened so soon.

Felicia said...

I am glad that they stepped forward in the beginning instead of stepping in after more then a year when they start talking TPR.

Penelope said...

Poor George! Lucky George! Our removals usually occur after a judge signs a conservativeship order.

CCmomma said...

we are about to embark on the world of Foster Care and in CO you can't be with a private agency and in the foster care system. I just found your blog and am adding it to mine. I'm sure it will be a world of help to us in the next few months. We have finished our state training and will switch our profile in a few short months. Thanks so much!
please add us to your blog roll too!!!

Mary said...

Penny- what is a conservativeship order?