(I submitted it last week but my mom was the only person I told because I didn't even know if it would be published or not)
I feel so validated. Click here to read it.
Monday, September 21, 2009
My Letter to the Editor
My mother-in-law called me this morning to tell me that I had a letter to the editor published in the Deseret News!
(I submitted it last week but my mom was the only person I told because I didn't even know if it would be published or not)
I feel so validated. Click here to read it.
(I submitted it last week but my mom was the only person I told because I didn't even know if it would be published or not)
I feel so validated. Click here to read it.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Unmet Expectations
When I experience times in my life when I feel like my desires or expectations are very different than what I had originally "planned" or when I feel like my prayers just aren't being answered, I know that I need to develop more patience and more trust in the Lord- which, of course, is always much easier said than done!
Since HOPE is synonymous with EXPECTATIONS, I'd like to share a couple of thoughts about what happens when we expect or desire something that hasn't come to pass . . .
My sister gave me a copy of this poem a long time ago about trusting the Lord with your prayers. Although I have used it in a lesson or two I don't know who the author is.
Prayer
I know not by what methods rare,
But this I know, God answers prayer.
I know that He has given His word,
Which tells me prayers are always heard
And will be answered, soon or late
and so I pray . . . and calmly wait.
I know not if the answer sought
Will come in just the way I thought,
But leave my prayer with him alone,
Whose ways are wiser than my own;
Assured that He will grant my quest.
Or send an answer far more blessed.
Sometimes God has different plans for us than we do.
Click here to watch a four minute Mormon Message on Trusting in the Lord. This story is about a family who waited 7 years for a child to join their family. Hmmm... sounds familiar!
Here's a quote by C.S. Lewis' Mere Christianity along the lines of our own expectations for us versus the Lord's expectations for/of us.
Since HOPE is synonymous with EXPECTATIONS, I'd like to share a couple of thoughts about what happens when we expect or desire something that hasn't come to pass . . .
My sister gave me a copy of this poem a long time ago about trusting the Lord with your prayers. Although I have used it in a lesson or two I don't know who the author is.
Prayer
I know not by what methods rare,
But this I know, God answers prayer.
I know that He has given His word,
Which tells me prayers are always heard
And will be answered, soon or late
and so I pray . . . and calmly wait.
I know not if the answer sought
Will come in just the way I thought,
But leave my prayer with him alone,
Whose ways are wiser than my own;
Assured that He will grant my quest.
Or send an answer far more blessed.
Sometimes God has different plans for us than we do.
Click here to watch a four minute Mormon Message on Trusting in the Lord. This story is about a family who waited 7 years for a child to join their family. Hmmm... sounds familiar!
Here's a quote by C.S. Lewis' Mere Christianity along the lines of our own expectations for us versus the Lord's expectations for/of us.
"Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself."
Finally, wise counsel from an apostle of the Lord on ways of handling adversity, including trusting Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.
This 3 minute clip is from Elder Wirthlin's "Come What May and Love It" Conference address:
I love the promise that "The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude."
The Infinite Power of Hope
I just finished watching a clip on Mormon Messages about HOPE:
It is quite ironic that the clip was all about HOPE as that is a subject I have been thinking about a lot lately.
In fact, I am finally going to finish and publish two posts about hope today.
It is quite ironic that the clip was all about HOPE as that is a subject I have been thinking about a lot lately.
In fact, I am finally going to finish and publish two posts about hope today.
Defining Hope
The June 2009 Ensign had an article I really enjoyed entitled Hope: The Misunderstood Sister by Larry Hiller.
I liked the article for the following reasons:
*The author defined the concept/quality of hope as it relates to her "sisters" Faith and Charity:
"Hope is anything but wishful. It is strong and bright with promise. It is expectation based on experience".
I appreciated this since the scriptures have given me good definitions of faith and charity, (see Hebrews 11:1 and Moroni 7:47) but hope has always been a little bit ambiguous to me.
*The author was very concise- the article was only two pages long.
Very impressive for someone like me who goes on and on when I write, rather than keeping things simple!
*The article included a painting of Faith, Hope, and Charity personified.
*The author not only wrote an essay, but a very touching poem as well.
I could paraphrase the article, but I'll just let you read it yourself.
And while we're on the topic of HOPE . . . Check out some of these inspiring necklaces from mrs. r's etsy shop.
I liked the article for the following reasons:
*The author defined the concept/quality of hope as it relates to her "sisters" Faith and Charity:
"Hope is anything but wishful. It is strong and bright with promise. It is expectation based on experience".
I appreciated this since the scriptures have given me good definitions of faith and charity, (see Hebrews 11:1 and Moroni 7:47) but hope has always been a little bit ambiguous to me.
*The author was very concise- the article was only two pages long.
Very impressive for someone like me who goes on and on when I write, rather than keeping things simple!
*The article included a painting of Faith, Hope, and Charity personified.
*The author not only wrote an essay, but a very touching poem as well.
I could paraphrase the article, but I'll just let you read it yourself.
And while we're on the topic of HOPE . . . Check out some of these inspiring necklaces from mrs. r's etsy shop.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Molly's Back in Foster Care
A couple of weeks before my surgery I got a call from our Resource Family Consultant (RFC) telling me that Molly "might" be coming back into foster care.
MIGHT? What does that mean?!
Our RFC didn't really know any other details at the moment but she said that DCFS was trying to "explore all their options" and were putting "back-up plans in place". They just wanted to make sure that Jared and I were still willing to take Molly as a placement if it came to that.
"OF COURSE!" I told her. She then told me that DCFS would know more about the situation in a couple of days and then they'd be able to make a decision. She promised she would contact me either way- whether Molly came back into custody or not.
A couple of days passed and I didn't hear anything. I tried to remain calm on the outside but inside I was speculating like crazy. I tried to convince myself that no news was good news even though deep down I was frustrated and antsy that nobody had called me back. And of course, Murphy's Law applied to the situation: our RFC happened to be going out of town for about a week so even if I did try to call for more info I wouldn't be able to talk to her anyway!
Although I was extremely stressed I got the feeling that I should just "let things slide". So I tried to be patient, brush things aside, and busy myself with other things, but Molly was on my mind constantly.
The week after my surgery I couldn't wait any longer so I called our RFC back. I was hoping that she had just forgotten to call me back which turned out to be the case and she apologized profusely.
"Can you tell me if anything happened with Molly's case?"
"Yes" she said. Then she took a minute to track down her notes.
"Molly and her brother were placed," she continued . . .
(long pause while looking for the info)
. . ."Here it is" . . .
"with a maternal relative".
I wasn't expecting to hear that.
"WHEN were they placed?" I asked next.
"Let's see . . ." (more pausing)
"August 5th. That was just 2 days ago".
I started feeling a little betrayed, helpless, and even defensive that she had been placed without us even being told a thing.
"Aren't WE supposed to have first priority in taking her as a placement?" I asked, surprised at how defensive I sounded.
Our patient RFC explained that we do have first priority UNLESS there is a relative who is available. And THIS TIME there happened to be a relative who was willing to come forward and take both children (Molly and her little brother) and pass a background check and get approved by DCFS. (When Molly was in our care the first time, no relatives except for her birthfather's parents were interested in stepping forward. Even so, DCFS didn't feel comfortable placing her with them)
"But . . ." our RFC continued, "If things don't work out with this relative, then you will definitely be contacted."
I felt like a runner-up in a contest being given a consultation prize.
It didn't matter that my husband and I were the ones who cared for Molly for nine months of her life (from the time she was 4 months to 13 months old) or that she had at one time been attached to us in a safe, loving home.
MIGHT? What does that mean?!
Our RFC didn't really know any other details at the moment but she said that DCFS was trying to "explore all their options" and were putting "back-up plans in place". They just wanted to make sure that Jared and I were still willing to take Molly as a placement if it came to that.
"OF COURSE!" I told her. She then told me that DCFS would know more about the situation in a couple of days and then they'd be able to make a decision. She promised she would contact me either way- whether Molly came back into custody or not.
A couple of days passed and I didn't hear anything. I tried to remain calm on the outside but inside I was speculating like crazy. I tried to convince myself that no news was good news even though deep down I was frustrated and antsy that nobody had called me back. And of course, Murphy's Law applied to the situation: our RFC happened to be going out of town for about a week so even if I did try to call for more info I wouldn't be able to talk to her anyway!
Although I was extremely stressed I got the feeling that I should just "let things slide". So I tried to be patient, brush things aside, and busy myself with other things, but Molly was on my mind constantly.
The week after my surgery I couldn't wait any longer so I called our RFC back. I was hoping that she had just forgotten to call me back which turned out to be the case and she apologized profusely.
"Can you tell me if anything happened with Molly's case?"
"Yes" she said. Then she took a minute to track down her notes.
"Molly and her brother were placed," she continued . . .
(long pause while looking for the info)
. . ."Here it is" . . .
"with a maternal relative".
I wasn't expecting to hear that.
"WHEN were they placed?" I asked next.
"Let's see . . ." (more pausing)
"August 5th. That was just 2 days ago".
I started feeling a little betrayed, helpless, and even defensive that she had been placed without us even being told a thing.
"Aren't WE supposed to have first priority in taking her as a placement?" I asked, surprised at how defensive I sounded.
Our patient RFC explained that we do have first priority UNLESS there is a relative who is available. And THIS TIME there happened to be a relative who was willing to come forward and take both children (Molly and her little brother) and pass a background check and get approved by DCFS. (When Molly was in our care the first time, no relatives except for her birthfather's parents were interested in stepping forward. Even so, DCFS didn't feel comfortable placing her with them)
"But . . ." our RFC continued, "If things don't work out with this relative, then you will definitely be contacted."
I felt like a runner-up in a contest being given a consultation prize.
It didn't matter that my husband and I were the ones who cared for Molly for nine months of her life (from the time she was 4 months to 13 months old) or that she had at one time been attached to us in a safe, loving home.
None of that matters because we're not blood relatives, we're just lowly foster parents and as such we have no legal rights to this child or any say in the matter. Such is Foster Care!
I asked for Molly' caseworkers number to see if she could give me any more details. The caseworker was very nice but explained pretty much the same thing, "I can't really tell you anything- Sorry."
"Can you at least tell me how she's doing?" I asked.
"Oh sure- she's doing just fine." she casually answered.
So that's all I know about Molly: She's back in foster care, but not with us, and she's doing just "fine". Whatever that means.
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